A woman who got mad at her boyfriend for getting on a plane before her is slammed online.
In a post on Reddit’s Am I the A******? (AITA) forum on Nov. 10, user u/anchordwn explained that her boyfriend was allowed to board before she was because he was in the military. Despite boarding the plane “less than five minutes later”, the poster was annoyed with her boyfriend, causing a “slight argument” during the journey.
After reading the story, Reddit users voted u/anchordwn “the a******” in the situation, with the post receiving nearly 10,000 votes and more than 3,500 comments.
‘Communicate in advance’
A 2019 poll found that couples argue an average of 12 times while traveling. Parking app Spot Hero surveyed 2,000 Americans and found that the top stressors were bad weather (44 percent), traffic on the road (41 percent), and losing something while traveling (37 percent).
You can’t always control what will happen during your trip, but you can prevent stressful situations from leading to fights with your partner. Sam Zand, a licensed psychiatrist, chief medical officer at Better U, and CEO of the Anywhere Clinic, said communicating your expectations prior to your trip can help resolve issues as they arise.
“Talk to your partner beforehand about concerns and requests,” he said News Week.
“We often assume that our partners must know our feelings and desires, but it can be helpful to communicate carefully beforehand.
“Talking about it afterwards can cause someone to get defensive. Instead of dwelling on this past experience, we can use that energy to plan together and prepare for the next trip.”
Zand said taking steps to make travel less stressful in general could also be helpful.
“You’re literally in airplane mode, so take advantage of it,” he said.
“Bring headphones, download your favorite playlist, bring a journal or book, and consider a meditation mask to reduce the stimulation of a busy plane.
“For some, airports are stressful. Be extra kind to each other and recognize that we want to look our best during times when we can easily become anxious. Breathwork, meditation, and relaxing music can help calm our nerves so we can cope better with the stressors that may come our way.”
‘Huge rights vibes’
In her post, anchordwn said she and her boyfriend flew to her parents’ house for Thanksgiving. The couple checked into the airport together, but were separated into different boarding groups.
“He was 1st grade, as he is an active duty military, I was 3rd grade, because he was a platinum card holder with the airline,” she wrote.
“This is important because both groups are considered priority boarding.”
Anchordwn describes themselves as a ‘seasoned traveller’ and likes to avoid boarding the main group as they are ‘slower’.
“Obviously when the plane started boarding, they first called group one, the active duty military and unaccompanied minors group — and my friend gets up and gets on without me,” she said.
“I was annoyed, since groups 1 and 2 are both super small, and group 3, my group, usually gets called super fast if not combined with group two.”
Less than five minutes later, the poster’s group was called to board the plane. Once inside, she confronted her boyfriend that she had to go ahead of her.
“I told him he could have waited for my group to be called and we could have boarded together,” she continued.
“He told me it wasn’t a problem, and I said it was since we were traveling together, he’d never done that before, why would he do it randomly now, and he had no reason other than ‘it’s for me, why not use that group even though my group is still considered priority boarding?”
The situation escalated into an argument, with the poster asking fellow redditors if she was “the a**********” because she was annoyed.
Unfortunately for anchordwn, users felt she was out of step, with Hoodie_Boom_boom telling her to “grow up”.
Kossl2000 concurred, writing, “Given huge allowances too.”
“Are you really mad because BF boarded the plane a few minutes early?” said Huge_Industry_1259.
“You say you’re a seasoned traveler, so why are you so horny and bothered that he left your side for a few minutes?
‘What is he going to do? Steal a coke from the galley before you get on the plane? Put on rabbit slippers you don’t approve of?’
While Ellie_Reads_Romance commented “If I were him I’d always step in for you because I’d need the 10 minute break from your nagging and pettiness.”
However, after reading the comments, anchordwn “accepted” the verdict.
“I accept that I was a huge asshole, and that I should have chosen my battles and not started an argument over something so insignificant and petty,” she wrote in an update to her post.
“I’ll give him a big apology this morning.”
News week has contacted u/anchordwn for comment. We were unable to verify the details of the case.
Have you noticed any red flags that caused you to end a relationship? Let us know at [email protected] We can ask experts for advice and your story can get on Newsweek.